See : MALLARMÉ Stephane (1842-1898) Are there only public festivals : I also know withdrawn ones… (Mallarméé)
" The Z. of a class of Special Mathematics tells me confidentially the following epithets such as rattled off by their principal professor and collated by some unhappy ragged freshmen :
Calamity Ducks, Twerps, Airheads, Rust Buckets, Jerks, Nobodies, Numskulls, Cuckolds, Rotters, Birdbrains, Ninnies, Bourgeois, Disgustings, Outlaws, Dunces, Redheads, Brats, Rotten Swines ,Tramps, Cretins, Badly Formed, Duffers, Clods, Hooligans, Crackpots, Thugs, Lefties, Bloody Nuisances, Losers, Wet Behind the Ears, Birds of Evil Repute, Bastards, Filthy Sods, Blasted Idiots, Dolts, Fat Heads, Cattle, Monkeys, Pharisees, Drips, Judas, Batty, Brutes, Neanderthals, Beginner's Luck, Total Idiots, Silly Geese, Muck-heaps , Queer Fish, Neathens, Virgins, Incompetents, Clots, Kids, Dead Wood, Unfortunates, Corpses, Urchins, Twits, Blooming Idiots, Wizards, Scapegoats, etc...",
out of which the following questions are formulated :
1/ Translate into: a) New Guinean English - b) The Wall Street English, the above vocables and commentaries.
2/ Subsidiary question (reserved for the Inspectors General, the Presidents and Members of the Jury of the great Concours in State Education) : Does the translation of Hemingway’s novel “The Old Man and the Sea .” (Nobel Prize for literature) signed by a member of the Académie française under the title “Le Vieil Homme et la Mer ” (Publisher Gallimard) count more misinterpretations than pages or more pages than misinterpretations?
" First Prize : a cruise by “bateau-mouche” (embarkation point Quai de Conti)
"Results of the Concours Général, first answers to the subsidiary question" :
R.E. (University of Gascony, Bordeaux 3 ; Jury agrégation in English) : “It would be best for you to speak to a good bookseller and to ask him to have a look at the list of the French books on sale.”
S.M. (Paris-Sorbonne ; Jury agrégation in English) : “It would probably be of use to you, in order to have safer and more precise information, to approach Madame G.H.-M... I know that she has worked on Hemingway and in particular on his style ...”
Mme G. H.-M. (University of Reims) : “The best-known French translation of the “ Vieil Homme et la Mer.” is the one by Jean Dutourd, taken up by professor R. A. for his edition of the novels in the collection “Pléiade.” ... I hope that it will satisfy you.”
V. D. (University of Toulouse ; Jury agregation in English) : “You give me too flatteringly credit for a wealth of knowledge I do not possess. I am not an Americanist. It would be necessary ... to ask parisian colleagues and recognized and known Americanizing researchers for their opinion ... ”
R. B. (Inspector General in State Education ; Jury for the agregation in English) : “I can only point out to you the edition of la “Pléiade.” published by Gallimard. I would add that no matter which good bookseller will usefully guide you in the choice you wish to make. ”
R. L.-V. (Dean of the university of Paris Sorbonne; President of the jury for the agrégation in English) : “I can only recommend to you the French edition of Hemingway’s works published in 1969 in the collection “La Pléiade.” by Gallimard ...”, etc.
And their Maths professor adding :
“ I won’t eat the soup with you ! - Bastards like you are unable to march on 14 July ! - I won’t pose on the photo with bells, I won’t ! - Go dig your parents’ garden ! - Long live laziness and long live Europe, thus you’ll see the foreigners disembark ! - I’ve been brought up in the school of effort, I have, and not in that of laziness ! - You don’t give a fucking damn about the head of the populo, do you ! - I have no fucking business with fellows like you ! - Band of funny ones, you don’t understand a thing ! - You are like the pharisees, you enter the temple and attend the service ! - There’s work along the road for the lazy pretenders ! - Ah, it is beautiful, your New Society ! - It’s useless, I know well that I shoot into the water ! - You’re handicapped by the disgusting studies you’ve done, frankly ! - Do I therefore give you nicknames ? - No but shit, really, do I insult you ?”
Claude d’Esplas (Les Merlufleaux)
All rights reserved
Translation : Dagmar Coward Kuschke (Tübingen)